Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Breaking down the city's voters, by quarters

Posted By on Wed, Apr 6, 2011 at 2:02 PM

One of the hoariest maxims of Colorado Springs politics is the so-called 25 percent rule, a simple and elegant way of predicting local elections/understanding the local electorate.

Divide the voters into four quartiles.

— 25 percent are liberal/moderate left.

— 50 percent are moderate right/traditional conservative.

— 25 percent are devoted members of the lunatic right: birthers, conspiracy theorists, survivalists, radical taxophobes, Ron Paul campaign contributors, and hopelessly devoted to Douglas Bruce and all of his works.

Sean Paige

Of the 80,000 or so folks who voted in Tuesday’s election, approximately 20,000 (exactly 25 percent!) cast their votes for the Dougster’s Reform Team.

Nice going, guys! By concentrating your votes on a bizarrely constructed and visibly demented slate which, as one mayoral candidate put it, scared the beejeezus out of 75 percent of the electorate, you assured the defeat of Sean Paige, the city’s most visible and articulate conservative.

Doesn’t that make you feel good? Look at the results: a City Council overwhelmed by a wave of moderation. Val Snider? Merv Bennett? Tim Leigh? Brandy Williams? Jan Martin? These folks aren’t scanning the skies for black helicopters, or trying to track down the president’s birth certificate in Tanganyika, Tahiti, or Timbuktu. They want to govern carefully and responsibly!!

And Steve Bach/Richard Skorman? They’re reasonable and serious men!!

So on to the runoff, which the lunatic right will no doubt shun — there’s no difference between the candidates. Where’s Michele Bachmann when you need her? But maybe there’s hope for Tim Leigh — after all, I introduced him to Michele in Washington in the fall of 2009.

You’ll be glad to know that they got along famously, speaking swiftly in an obscure American idiom that only natives of Minnesota and the Dakotas (Leigh) understand.

Don’t understand what I’m talking about? Stream Fargo on Netflix.

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