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Anthropologist digs up Democrat 

click to enlarge Demo Erectus: The shocking prehistoric remains of a long-dead El Paso County Democrat discovered recently, still clutching his ACLU membership card
  • Demo Erectus: The shocking prehistoric remains of a long-dead El Paso County Democrat discovered recently, still clutching his ACLU membership card

Berkeley anthropologist

Schlomo Sakorski has stumbled upon the find of a lifetime: an El Paso County Democrat, a species long assumed to be extinct.

Sakorski said he located a frozen, well-preserved corpse of a suspected Democrat in a deep snowbank behind a secluded cabin on a Manitou Springs hillside.

Scholars from around the world are flocking to the locale to study the relic firsthand. "This is an outstanding opportunity to study a species we thought had disappeared from El Paso County long ago," said Sakorski.

The Democrat was reputedly dressed in conventional attire and appeared to be normal in most respects. "He did have a beard, though," notes Sakorski.

Scholars speculate that the Democrat has been dead for several years.

"It's a long shot,"

said Sakorski, "but this find raises the possibility that Democrats might still exist in El Paso County."

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