Saturday, May 25, 2013
Cinefiles
Driven to Kill (NR)
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment
Steven Seagal is a former Russian mafioso
turned crime novelist, the first two reasons Driven to Kill is
so damn entertaining. Not only do you see Seagal, who struggles with
English, wrestle around with a husky Russian accent, but you also see
his take on the life of a writer. And yes, it does include slamming
faces into walls, bookcases, drinking glasses ... you get the point. Of
course Seagal's dragged back into mafia life when his daughter is
assaulted on her wedding day, which forces him to take down the
wrongdoers one-by-one, in the doughiest way possible. Sure, action fans
have seen it all before, but, c'mon, how can you not find this
stuff fun? Driven is a straight-to-video must-rent, for action
fans and cheese fans alike. — Louis Fowler Purchase the DVD: Driven to Kill
Silent Venom (NR)
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment / Release: June 2
Less than one minute into Silent Venom,
you learn everything you need to know about this flick: On a remote
island, giant, angry mutated (and wonderfully CGI-ed) snakes are being
bred for the military by pin-up-girl scientist Krista Allen. You know
from that info alone that soon, all hell will break loose, and break
loose it does! The giant snakes are set free on a decommissioned
submarine during an attack by the Chinese — Snakes on a
Sub, anyone? — and only military man James O'Neill (Luke
Perry, wonderfully slumming here) can bring them down! Directed by
hack-meister extraordinaire Fred Olen Ray, Silent is low-budget,
SciFi Channel, nature-gone-amok goodness, the kind of goofy movie you
watch on a lazy Saturday afternoon while scarfing Pringles and Dr
Pepper. Just like I did. — Louis FowlerPurchase the DVD: Silent Venom
Fanboys (PG-13)
Weinstein Co.
In 1998, a few aimless, 20-something Star
Wars fanatics make a cross-country pilgrimage from Ohio to George
Lucas HQ, determined to sneak a pre-release peek at Episode I: The
Phantom Menace before one of them dies of cancer. Wackiness ensues,
but most of what should be funny seems tired and limp, as occasional
swerves into Serious Acting become painfully funny. The cast includes
alumni of Cavemen, Freddy vs. Jason, Balls of Fury and Gossip
Girl, plus a shameless cameo parade. With the movie already a
hodgepodge of rambling commentary and extraneous scenes, the DVD offers
more of the same. — Jonathan KieferPurchase the DVD: Fanboys
Wandering Ginza Butterfly (NR)
Synapse Films
When it comes to classic '70s Japanese cinema,
no actress epitomizes coolness like cult actress Meiko Kaji. While she
may look like a demure beauty, she becomes a deadly black widow when
she's crossed, wielding a samurai sword like she was born with it in
her hand. In this classic, she's an ex-con who runs afoul of the Yakuza
(a crew of pimps and hustlers in the seedy part of Tokyo). Using her
supernatural skills as a gambler and a pool shark, she fights the mob,
leading to a bloody finale in which she slashes her sword across the
chests and into the backs of the underworld. Wandering Ginza
Butterfly is part of the very popular "Pinky Violence" sub-genre,
and while the film eschews the sex of other films of this ilk, it's
full throttle with the action and suspense. This is vengeance cinema at
its finest. — Louis FowlerPurchase the DVD: Wandering Ginza Butterfly
Wandering Ginza Butterfly 2: She-Cat Gambler (NR)
Synapse Films
If Meiko Kaji was the coolest Japanese actress
of the '70s, then superstar Sonny Chiba is Japan's Steve McQueen. So it
was only logical that Toei Studios would team its two most bankable
stars for an even more rousing, over-the-top Wandering Ginza
Butterfly sequel. This one finds Kaji trying to track down the
killer of her father, taking her again into sleazy gambling parlors
where she mixes it up with unsavory characters to find the culprit,
with Chiba tagging along. As in the first Butterfly, the
showpiece is the explosive finale, with Kaji and Chiba, back-to-back
with sword and gun, taking on a houseful of well-dressed gangsters.
(Just pick 'n choose the scenes Tarantino "homaged" for Kill
Bill.) They don't hold back, and when she gets her revenge, look
out, because she's as badass as it gets! — Louis
FowlerPurchase the DVD: Wandering Ginza Butterfly 2: She-Cat Gambler
