May 7, 2003
New Star Discovery Inc.
4239 Maray Drive
Rockford, IL 61107
Dear New Star Discovery Inc.:
What follows may appear insensitive or fatuous, perhaps both. However, I plan on making it happen and would appreciate any advice you might offer.
It is my understanding that your organization runs beautiful baby competitions. Everyone loves a cute baby, no argument there. The thing of it is, not all babies are cute. Without being crude, some look more like ill-conceived genetic experiments than potential human beings. And yet, every day, young women are sutured into the culture of baby-fetishization in which cuteness is the sine qua non. Like one more item in a glossy catalog, the cute baby becomes something a woman believes she must have in order to feel complete. Such imposed standards cloud one's ability to make a rational decision whether or not to reproduce.
This is one of several reasons I'm set to launch: Kenneth Cleaver's Ugly Baby-Blowout. There is no shame in owning an ugly baby. Most will grow up into reasonable-looking adults and competition is the American way. So why not?
Is America ready for an ugly baby contest? Quite frankly, I don't know. But it's sure going to be fun finding out.
I look forward to your thoughts.