Dr. Neal Schiesske
Koreja Do Christian Marital Arts Association
5950 Pernella Road
Pensacola, FL 32504
Dear Dr. Schiesske:
I have long been interested in pursuing the marital arts, but whenever I bring up the subject people start jabbering about black belt this and brown belt that, and won't it hurt to smash a cinderblock over your head?
I don't doubt these exercises serve their purpose, but I want to make sure we're on the same page. Below are the goals I wish to work toward in my study of the marital arts. Please let me know the program track I need to pursue and how I might ready myself for this demanding art form.
Intimacy: Defeating your marital opponent with kindness and compassion.
Withholding Sex: To gain physical and psychological advantage over your marital opponent.
Techniques: For low-impact deflection of in-laws and other extra-familial opponents.
Advanced Marital Combat Part 1: Transforming the implements of domestic chores into marital aids.
Advanced Marital Combat Part 2: Breaking stuff.
Stealth: The extramarital art (for advanced practitioners only).
While I'm sure there are other facets of the marital arts that I'll need to familiarize myself with, I must master the above as soon as possible. My opponent is gaining strategic advantage through her use of a clinical therapist and anti-depressant weaponry.
Sincerely,
Kenneth Cleaver