I'm not going to use this space to discuss Lance Armstrong's credentials. Seriously, if you don't know who the guy is by now, you're clearly not plugged in. But here's something you probably don't know: The legendary cancer-surviving, pop-star-dating, cyclist-turned-philanthropist will be in town today to provide the keynote address at the inaugural Kids on Bikes fundraising dinner in The Broadmoor Hall (1 Lake Ave.). The aim: to help get bikes into the hands of the deserving youth of Colorado Springs. The cocktail/dinner party starts at 6 p.m. and costs $150 to attend. For more information, visit kidsonbikes.net. PF
"Hi, I'm Bob Patten. You may remember me from such literary gems as Old Tools New Eyes, and Peoples of the Flute." In the spirit of The Simpsons Movie, I had to. But Patten's no Troy McClure he's the genuine article, at least in the flintknapping world. Guy's been making arrowheads and spear points (and writing books) for 40-plus years, and he'll be at Contin-TAIL, Colorado's largest gem and mineral show. Held in conjunction with Buena Vista's Gold Rush Days, it's a full weekend of art, minerals, fossils, precious stones, beads, jewelry and more. Stop by the Rodeo Grounds (Rodeo Road, Buena Vista) between 9 and 5(ish) to see prospectors and dealers from all over the country. Visit coloradorocks.org for more. KW
I'm sure of it, here's your day today: Sometime between 1 and 6 p.m., you're going to drop $25 (which benefits local open spaces) to get into the fifth annual Craft Lager Festival in Soda Springs Park (1016 Manitou Ave., Manitou Springs), featuring a slew of bottom-fermented beer samples and live acoustic music. You'll call 685-9059 or visit craftlagerfestival.com for more. Then, from 7 to 9, you're going to shoot over to CC's Armstrong Quad (14 E. Cache la Poudre St.) to hear Ancient Grooves, the handful of musicians that play more than 100 instruments per show. This one's a freebie, sponsored by the Pikes Peak Library District. Call 531-6333 ext. 1221 for more. MS
With gas prices these days, I've often considered alternate transportation (read: a 10-speed). However, the idea that I would have to get up approximately two hours earlier than I do now keeps me from becoming an all-out bicycle enthusiast. Plus, I don't look good in teeny spandex. Join the real bikers or just admire them from afar at the Pikes Peak Classic Bike Ride at 6 a.m. today. The ride begins and ends at UCCS (1420 Austin Bluffs Pkwy.) and includes a post-ride party and meal. Distance options are 35, 65 and 100 miles. For more info or to register, call 578-9092. AG
I've heard that survivors of lightning strikes are mysteriously drawn out to electrical storms for years after the attack. But aren't we all compelled to step out to see such a natural spectacle anyway? Heather Oelklaus' stunning photographs of lightning from around town immortalize these seconds in the sky. Her show, Slight Chance of Thunderstorms at Third Eye Open (915 Manitou Ave., Manitou Springs) premiered Friday, but runs through Sept. 7. The gallery's hours are 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. daily. Call 685-9264 for details. EA
As a rule of thumb, I usually avoid attractions billed "Through the Third-Class Porthole." That's not my style, though I do think it pretty much sums up flying coach. I'd make an exception for Adventures at Sea from 6:30 to 8 tonight at the Renaissance Academy (2760 Fieldstone Road). The aforementioned title refers to an interactive dramatization relating to the Titanic, for older children's enjoyment. Storyteller Beth Epley will share other ocean tales for younger kids, and a lecture for parents, "Starting Off on the Right Foot," will cover preschoolers' needs. Call 475-2510 for more. MS
Palmer Lake resident David Stang has spent the last two years working to bring his sister's murderers to justice. Dorothy Stang, a nun, moved to Brazil in the 1970s, where she worked as an advocate for the poor. In 2005, at the age of 73, she was shot six times in the head at close range. Her death provoked international outrage. From 7 to 9 tonight at the Tri-Lakes Center for the Arts (304 Hwy 105, Palmer Lake), David Stang will present on his sister's life with slides and a documentary showing. A $10 donation is suggested. Call 481-0475 for more. AL
This week's 7 Days contributors: Edie Adelstein, Pete Freedman, Angela Grosshans, Amanda Lundgren, Matthew Schniper and Kirk Woundy.