Saturday, January 16, 2010

A confederacy of Constitutionalists

Posted By on Sat, Jan 16, 2010 at 8:10 AM

In contentious times like these, it can be difficult for your average, true-red-white-and-blue conservative to find an outlet that, you know, gets it.

Can’t turn to FOX News — they're only increasing their audience a measly 7 percent (good for third-most prime-time viewers among all cable channels), and apparently they’ll hire anybody.

Can’t turn to the G — they’re busy pushing FreshInk with their editorial space. How’s a conservative supposed to get good and worked up over how the tragedy in Haiti will play right into Barack Hussein Obama’s hands when most of the daily's time is spent begging for church activity updates?

Focus on the Family might be an option, but they’re pretty busy wrapping up their estimated $2.8 million dollar 30-second commercial starring the Bible-verse-on-eye-black-loving-est quarterback that ever done flung the pigskin. Surely the 275 people Focus has laid off in recent years will understand the cost after they witness the power and majesty of Tim Tebow doing ... anything.

No, these will not do. That’s why I thank God and Ronald Reagan (but I repeat myself) for The Constitutionalist Today, southern Colorado's newest voice of reason.

Published by Lana Fore-Warkocz — who laments on her Facebook page that the drop-out of Bill Ritter is one less Democrat "to make 'walk the plank' …" (do execution jokes ever get old?) — The Constitutionalist Today will launch Feb. 1 and be distributed at more than 900 locations.

TCT is bringing out the big guns too. Richard Randall has signed on, as has Jeff Crank.

What can we, the huddled masses yearning for Glenn Beck-isms, expect? What does our new freedom rag value?

"We the People" are created equal; therefore, no one person is above the law.

Including high level ex-Bush administration officials like Dick Cheney and Scooter Lib … oh.
"We the People" believe in traditional famliy [sic] values. Nobody makes decisions for me or my family aside from us.

Especially if you’re one of the thousands of bisexual, gay, lesbian and transg … oh.
"We the People" believe in God and His blessings for America.

Just like this guy.

One last goal of TCT is to "discover Constitutionalists who don’t yet realize what they are ..."

Personally, I can’t wait.

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