Thursday, May 9, 2013

Five things your mother would never expect for Mother's Day

Posted By on Thu, May 9, 2013 at 4:47 PM

There's all the obvious stuff, like flowers, cards and chocolatey goodness, but those things lack imagination. They're so overdone that we felt the need to depart from the paved and predictable Mom-appreciation road. Dear friends, please excuse the self-promotion and consider these humble suggestions a list less-traveled from our Garden of the Goods team.


1. A gift certificate to a pawn shop. Right? She'd never see it coming, and nothing says I LOVE YOU MOM! like NASCAR memorabilia and decorative knives! 

2. A zip line tour of Manitou Springs or a hot air balloon ride. This one is for moms who think adventure is driving to the mall alone. Is your mom terrified of heights? Then, yep — this is the perfect present for her.

3. A good shellacking. Fooled ya! We're talking nails here. It's springtime, and if your mom wants to wear sandals, her toes might need a coat of paint. But if you're more concerned about the state of her car, then proceed to #4. 

4. Wheel alignment. You know how you borrowed your mom's car that one time and curb-checked it at speed you now regret? Instead of confessing, you can make it right by giving her the gift of more efficient driving. Ta-da... You're a star!

5. Meat. Yes, vegetables are nice. But you know what's better? Bison, beef, lamb, pork and chicken! If you're feeling extra thoughtful, you might also suggest that your mom make you some Pappardelle's Pasta as a comfy noodle-bed for all that protein.




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