Strain review: Trainwreck Light Dep 

click to enlarge This light-deprived Trainwreck delivers a high that’s more cloudy than dreamy. - BRANDON SODERBERG
  • Brandon Soderberg
  • This light-deprived Trainwreck delivers a high that’s more cloudy than dreamy.
The light-deprivation growing technique psychs the pot plant out so that it responds to what seems to be the dwindling daylight hours of fall, harvest time, and has to get growing fast. In reality, the plant is just being hit with enough artificial darkness that the flowering cycle kicks off more often than it naturally would. The technique is becoming popular as legalization creates a growing demand for more and more weed. Bending nature’s will a bit, all in service of market forces.

Streamlining the process, taking it out of the ground and away from the sun, is something we should all be suspicious of when it is on this level, and some of its proselytizers surely give off the vibes of your average power-hungry and naive tech-doof utopian. But really, light dep cannabis is almost a different product entirely — so comparing and contrasting a strain grown under these conditions and one grown more conventionally can give us something resembling a scientific approach when it comes to parsing what light dep does to weed.

Last year, I reviewed Trainwreck, an especially satisfying pain-relieving strain that I praised in contrast to some other more melty, almost narcotic strains because it left me “more dreamy than cloudy,” and the relief it enables “races through your body and latches on to your joints and then lightly pounds and massages them for a few hours.” Trainwreck Light Dep is more cloudy than dreamy and its pain relief is less comprehensive (for some though maybe more focused like a Tylenol): a coy body high that travels and doesn’t so much lightly pound as gauchely vibrate like motel Magic Fingers. Many say light dep creates mostly mid-grade-like weed, which kind of makes sense — such is the case with a sped-up and just generally more artificial process — and Trainwreck vs. Trainwreck Light Dep bears this out for sure.
Its smell and taste were interesting, uglier though — a licorice scent with an about-to-rot citrus taste whereas regular Trainwreck I wrote, recalled a “lavender-infused cheap beer.” One baffling byproduct was that it gave me a cognitive superpower or something, anxiety and focus at the same time on a micro level such as when I smoked some and was about to lock my door and realized I didn’t have my keys. It made me more responsible and responsive. FWIW, on Trainwreck regular I’d have more likely remembered this too late and locked my stupid, stoned ass out of my apartment.

So maybe I welcome more mid-grade shit at this moment and light dep is the way to get that, since the industry is all behind it. There is just so much weed (knock-you-out strains and potent, even cruel hybrids with names that invoke thrash metal bands) and so many weed-ingesting techniques (smoking dabs off a nail with a blowtorch like you’re cosplaying as some pot version of Pooky from New Jack City) that as my fellow reviewer Baynard Woods has said, seemingly intend to “make soft drugs hard,” and that doesn’t make much sense. Here, light dep tempers the fuck-you-up qualities of Trainwreck, turning a strain that may be too much for a whole bunch of people into something only slightly less rewarding and more manageable, less like a trainwreck, more like say, a fender-bender.

Strength: 7
Nose: Sambuca and a Tangerine La Croix
Euphoria: 7
Existential dread: 3
Freaking out when a crazy person approaches you: 4
Drink pairing: Sambuca and a Tangerine La Croix
Music pairing: LOL Boys, Changes EP, or Ariel Kalma, An Evolutionary Music (Original Recordings: 1972-1979)
Rating: 7


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